Ivana Bodrožić

hrvaščina

Damir Šodan

angleščina

[Voljela bih biti otac mojoj kćeri]

Voljela bih biti otac mojoj kćeri
s mekanim i mirisnim dlačicama na rukama
u koje zabija nos i opija se
tamnim, muškim, sigurnim

nositi broj 43, najmanje,
da mi se popne na prste
i bude najviša od svih
i ne klizi dolje

da se sakrije iza mojih leđa

da me zavodljivo gleda

da budem uporište kad više ničega nema,
zadnje, najzadnje
nepokorivo

da se znam smijati
praviti nered
igrati šah,
i koga je Perzej ljubio

nestati

očevi pouzdano znaju nestati
majke ostaju za mržnju

krivih usana
ukočenih ramena
općenito propadljivijeg tijela
s malo ili sasvim bez trikova

mrzeći svoje majke
koje nikada nisu znale
kako im biti očevi.

© Ivana Bodrožić
Iz: In a sentimental mood
Zagreb: Sandorf, 2017
Avdio produkcija: Haus für Poesie, 2021

[I’d love to be a father to my daughter]

I’d love to be a father to my daughter
with soft and fragrant little hairs on his hands
so she can bury her nose in them, getting drunk
on something dark, safe and masculine

my feet a size 43 European at least
so she can stand on my toes
feeling taller than everyone else
and not slip down

so she can hide behind my back

and eye me seductively

so I can be her anchor when all else is gone,
her last, very last unconquerable
resort

so I can know how to laugh
mess things up
play chess
and know who Perseus was in love with

how to disappear

for fathers know how to disappear convincingly
while mothers remain to be hated

with twisted lips
and stiff shoulders
bodies generally prone to decay
with very few if any tricks up their sleeve

while hating their own mothers
who never knew
how to father them.

Translated by Damir Šodan