Kako brati in zakaj

Ne, kar je bilo zares, ampak kako
je bilo zapisano. V zvezdah in premikih
prometa, v hišah na samem in velikih mestih.
Jezus je prava rešitev za vse težave, pravijo
pridigarji na vogalih in prenosnih odrih.
In šele takrat imamo pravo zabavo.
Kako to brati in zakaj
imeti sveto pismo za podstavek,
biti ta napol ležeči bralec
živčne besede, ki se lušči od stropa
tako diskretno kot pojasnilo.

Saj naše knjige govorijo vse kaj drugega.
Prej je bila ljubezen večna,
a nekaj je moralo iti narobe.
Kako to brati in zakaj
je treba skozi ta pekel in kaj reči
bitjem, ki so bila tu pred nama
in bojo ostala, ko bova že zdavnaj mimo.
Kot da bi obstajal še en pekel,
ki ni tako pekoč in se lahko zbudiš
iz njega kot iz more.

Saj ne, kar je zares, ampak kar je
zapisano. V zvezkih, ki se sklonijo nad naju
kot prelomljene obljube,
umiram od žeje, da bi te spet videl srečno,
kot si bila takrat, ko sva se srečala.
Še vedno sva prosta in živa.
Občutljiva kot rastlina v polepljenem lončku,
ki ni uvela in že ves čas narašča
v nekaj, kar bo preživelo. Najine
približne predstave o strahu,
ki sva ga prepoznala drug v drugem.

Bil je najin, tu ni dvoma.

In vedno znova pojasnilo, vedno znova.

© Primož Čučnik
Iz: Delo in dom
Ljubljana: Lud Literatura, 2007
Avdio produkcija: 2008

How to read and why

Not what it really was but how

it was written. In stars and shifts

in traffic in desolate houses, and big cities.

Jesus is the true answer for all the troubles, preachers

say on street-corners and makeshift platforms.

And only then do we have a real show.

How to read this and why

the holy bible for a pedestal

to be this reader, half-reclining, reading

hectic words, peeling off from the ceiling

discretely like an explanation.


It’s that our books say anything but this.

Love used to be eternal

but something must have gone amiss.

How to read this and why

do you need to go through this hell and what to say

to beings who were here before the two of us

and will remain once we are gone.

As though there were another hell

but not as spicy and you can easily wake up

from it as from a nightmare.


Not what’s really true but what’s

written. In notebooks bending over us

like broken promises,

I’m dying of thirst to see you happy

again, as you were when we first met.

We still are free and alive.

Vulnerable like a flower in a small decorated pot,

it has not wilted, all along it rises

into something that will outlive. Our

vague images of fear

we recognized in each other.


No doubt, it was ours.


And every time over and again explanations.

Translated by Ana Pepelnik and Matthew Zapruder