Nikah Pisau

aku sampai entah di mana. berputar-putar
dalam labirin. perjalanan terpanjang
tanpa peta. dan inilah warna gelap paling
sempurna. kuraba gang di antara sungai
dan jurang.

ada jerit, serupa nyanyi. mungkin dari
mulutku sendiri. kudengar erangan, serupa
senandung. mungkin dari mulutku sendiri.

tapi inilah daratan dengan keasingan paling
sempurna: tubuhmu yang bertaburan ulatulat
kuabaikan. sampai kurampungkan kenikmatan
sanggama. sebelum merampungkanmu juga: menikam
jantung dan merobek zakarmu, dalam segala
ngilu.

1992

© Dorothea Rosa Herliany

The Blades of Marriage

who knows where i am. whirling
inside a labyrinth. it is the longest journey
without a map. and this darkness is utterly
perfect. i grope my way through an alley flanked by a river
and a ravine.

there’s a scream, it sounds like a song. it may have
come from my mouth. i hear a moan, it sounds like
a hum. it may have come from my mouth.

but this land of alienation is utterly
perfect: your body that is scattered with worms,
i shall ignore - until i have completed this blissful
coitus and also, before i have completed stabbing
you in the heart, ripping out your cock and grating
you with every kind of pain.

Translated by Mona Zahra Attamimi